Dear Jewish Fairy Godmother:

What’s the etiquette of setting boundaries around politics and
discussions of same at Passover? I have a noisy, boisterous family that
includes to my shame supporters of Donald Trump as well as rabid
Hillary and Bernie people. I’m a liberal Democrat, but I am not doing
to disinvite my brother because he has outed himself as a right-wing
jerk. But I do not want the serious festivities to devolve into a political
food fight. Can I just ban all talk of politics?

Hostess

 
Dear Hostess:

You can set down any dictum you want. But the chances it will be
honored are pretty small, at least as far as I can tell, in this particular
election year, where everyone talks politics as often as they discuss
diets and which body part is aching and aging. In addition, Passover is
a holiday that is very much about liberation from oppression. I suspect
each guest will have his/her own view about what oppression means,
and feel very empowered to express that view, perhaps even more so
if you try to set boundaries that are perceived as harsh or strict.
If you try to make it humorous, you might get more traction. You
could say that there will be no political commentary during the reading
of the Haggadah, and that if anyone violates that rule they will suffer
some public shaming punishment, like no dessert. I doubt there would
be a serious food fight. But you can and should tell each of the
explicitly vocal people that you do not want your holiday disrupted,
and that if they cannot keep their comments civil and their voices
down, you would prefer that they not attend. That alone should be
enough to show them where you set the bar. If you need to, you could
send a reminder email the day before, with your confirmation of food
assignments. The PS should read, Remember, if you are tempted to
wave any political banner at this Seder, you will also have
responsibility for all forms of cleaning up the table and washing all the
dishes. That would convince most rational people to play and speak
nicely.