Dear Jewish Fairy Godmother:

I’m six months into a new relationship. It is friendly and compatible
and I think could last for a while. But the new honey just got a puppy,
right before he’s headed away to see his family (I’m not yet ready to
be introduced) and before he has a series of three-day workshop
trainings to conduct. Somehow he got the impression that I would be
just fine having an un-housebroken puppy stay at my house with my
aging cat, or, barring that, that I would be willing to sleep at his place
while he is away, so the puppy’s training and bonding process can
continue uninterrupted. My responses, in order, are No, Thanks.,
Thanks, No., and What are you kidding? Am I being selfish (his
charge) or reasonable (my response)?

Cat Woman

 
Dear Cat Woman:

I can understand his reluctance to take a sweet new puppy and pop
him/her in and out of a vet or boarding kennel, especially one that has
not yet had all the appropriate shots. But assuming that a girlfriend
would be willing to assume full care seems presumptuous. There are
professionals who provide these kinds of services, and that’s who he
should consult, or a different friend who is dog-oriented and willing.
Only you can decide if you are willing to put your relationship on the
line for this. But assuming without asking and respecting your
boundaries doesn’t signal a good long-term fit for domestic harmony
among the two, three, or four of you.