Dear Jewish Fairy Godmother:
I’m godmother in name and sort of fairy godmother in practice to the
son of a colleague. Since birth his parents have trained him to come
talk to me if he had a problem. In reality it has only happened a few
times, like when they were close to divorce a few years ago. His family
lacks for nothing materially. I despise giving money or gift cards as
presents, but he is graduating high school and moving two states away
to college. What can I give him that will mean more than an hour of
music downloads?
Fairy Godmother Too
Dear Fairy Godmother:
There are legions of us. It comes with the genetics and inclination to
solve problems. If all the incipient and practicing Jewish Fairy
Godmothers on the planet harnessed our energy at once we could
probably change the world, though most of us work on smaller stages.
I also don’t like gift cards. They’re impersonal and even though
everyone likes money, enough other people will supply it. I am a great
fan of books. They may seem old-fashioned to digitized youth but
while they’re still sold we’ll still have access to something you can lie
on a sofa and hold for insight and a nap. So get thee the local
bookstore and find a book about something he’s interested in, or even
a picture book of your state.
Second, give him a invite to come for a
meal. When you meet, tell him the 24/7 no matter what he’s done,
even if it involves bail money, still holds through college. Tell him he’s
going to face situations that he hasn’t before, and that while you trust
his judgment, all of us do stupid things sometimes. Say that no matter what, he should feel safe telling you, and you will help him think it
through.