Late Bloomer

Dear Jewish Fairy Godmother:

How do you stop people from spoiling TV shows? I do not normally
subscribe to premium channels and m sometimes a year or two behind
on some of the popular series. I can insulate myself from the general
media but what can I do about friends who insist on saying, OMG it
was so sad when So-and- So died! Or things like that. I’m not trying to
live in a bubble, but to date myself, it started when I learned that
Dumbledore had died in the Harry Potter books. I couldn’t even finish
reading them. I like my friends, and my willful ignorance.

Late Bloomer

 
Dear Late Bloomer:

Nothing succeeds like a simple request. When you get together with
folks, announce, I’m asking you to help me with my attempt to avoid
spoilers. I’ve collected a great list of reading and viewing choices.
Right now I’m in the middle of wafting/reading XYZ. Please please
please don’t tell me anything about the plot, your favorite characters,
or special scenes. It may feel great for you to relive them, but it’s
going to ruin it for me. If this book/show has a special media warm
spot in your heart, please tell me and I’ll signal when I’m done
because  I’ll be dying to talk to you about it then. Can you be a great
friend and help me?

 
Some people will honor your request. Others may treat you with
jesting or even mild scorn for being behind the times. But given the
vast viewing options these days, everyone is behind on something or
needs a broader life. While I once was unable to comprehend why a
person would binge watch rather than enjoy the weekly suspense, I
now am regularly a year behind on some popular shows, and catch up
in summer. Smile sweetly, and Say No spoilers please! Then put your
fingers in your ears and hum as needed.