Dear Jewish Fairy Godmother:

I used chits to recommend someone for a job. I know she is the
perfect hire. The friend whose medical practice she would manage
keeps hiring mid-20’s folks who leave him once they decide they have
found their life’s calling. Sarah is 42, a mother, and in relationship with
a good friend. She is mature, intelligent, experienced, and interested.
Or at east I thought she was. She just told me that a day before her
interview she emailed the doc bailing out, because her fiancé’s house
sale fell through (she will become wife number two; house was from
his first marriage) and she doesn’t want more stress. I think she is
being incredibly shortsighted, as the house will sell and her dream job
will be scooped up. Should I speak to one or all, or let it play out as it
does?

Yenta

 
Dear Yenta:

You know the old saying about leading a horse to water but not being
able to make it drink? Apply it here. You have been a good friend
trying to connect various lose people and situations that connect
through you. It sounds like the “dream job” may be coming at the
wrong time, which will make her not as much of a dream employee.
In fact, the doc whom she emailed to cancel may already be wiping his
brow thinking he dodged a bullet. What if she’d gotten the job and
then quit. Your chits would be gone and double gone.
Tell her, and her fiancé depending on how close a friend he is, what
you think. Tell the doc she was trying to be protective of her honey.
Then leave it up to all the consenting adults to see who fits where
best. Your work is done.