Dear Jewish Fairy Godmother:
This is pretty embarrassing. A close friend of mine was coming to town
for a mutual friend’s son’s graduation party. I asked her to bring me
something that’s edgily available where I live but that she has special
access to because of a medical situation. I might be able to find it, but
because of my social and professional situation, I am not comfortable
asking around. I brought four $50 folded into my pants pocket. It
cost only $100, so I put the money back in my pocket, because my
purse was sitting around in a room with lots of strangers. At home
when I went to put my money away, it was gone. Not in pants, my
coat, the floor of my new car, etc etc. etc. I drove over to look in the
streets, not that one would expect $100 to be sitting there overnight.
But I had been showing off the car. I emailed her saying “If you
happen to find….” Then the money showed up in the wash, freshly
laundered and very crisp. Now I am embarrassed, plus getting lectures
about “How could you lose that much money!” I didn’t really want to
explain what it was for. How can I lose the unsolicited advice.
Found It!

 
Dear Found It:
Reading between the lines of your unspoken acquisition, I am
assuming some form of adult contraband, either medical marijuana
or something sexual. Whatever your habit, you have to remember,
and factor in, the hidden costs of feeding it. If you’d paid $200 instead
of $100 for the mystery purchase, would it have felt fair to you? If
you’d given $100 to charity, would you feel okay about that? What’s
really bothering you: the fact that you outed yourself without needing
to, or some other guilt?

 
PS When you go to a party where you don’t trust people, keep
everything in a front pocket or carry a very small purse with ID and
keys that you can keep with you at all times. I’d also counsel
developing local sources as well as cleaning up your act.